There was a while back there when it seemed like my sole purpose in life was to banish the birthday treat from school classrooms.
I discussed the issue during my very first week of writing The Lunch Tray. I wrote about it some more when a libertarian reader took me on. It came up again when Sarah Palin decried one school’s efforts to ban birthday treats, and again when I was flooded with reader comments on that post. I wrote about banning birthday treats for my local free newspaper. I guest posted about it on The Wellness Bitch. I was even quoted on the issue by the Atlantic Monthly.
No one can claim I haven’t been pretty straightforward about my views.
Well, guess what? My daughter’s birthday is next week and she really wants me to bring sweet treats to school. I mean, she really, really, really wants me to. Sigh.
I just can’t do it, of course. I’m willing to cop to a little hypocrisy now and then (remember my confession about the Grapple?) but one candid cell phone photo of me toting birthday cupcakes to school would pretty much end my blogging career, and rightfully so.
I understand my daughter’s desire to have me bring to class something to commemorate her special day and I’m totally willing to bring any kind of non-food treat. I’m even willing to spend a little more money than I normally would to make her happy while sticking by my principles. But what item(s) fit the bill?
This is where you come in, Lunch Tray readers. I have five short days to figure this out and really need your help. But before you answer, keep in mind that these are sophisticated fifth graders. The old decorated-pencil-and-sticker thing is not going to cut it.
Discuss.
[Ed. Update: TLT readers totally came through! Read “A Happy Ending to the Classroom Birthday Treat Dilemma.”]
Kia says
Yikes not a fun situation to be in!!! Some ideas:
Rainbow Fruit Sticks (kids love these):
http://www.todayiatearainbow.com/the-kids-cook-monday-9/
Or ladybugs:
http://www.todayiatearainbow.com/healthy-and-yummy-valentines-treat/
Non food ideas:
stickers, Silly putty, sidewalk chalk, deck of cards, Yo-Yo’s, play dough, bubbles, skipping ropes
Hope this is helpful and good luck!!!!
June says
Gosh, you are in a pickle (I don’t suppose you could bring pickles?). Fruit dipped in chocolate (Chocolate is good for you!)? As for me, I always just bring a few dozen doughnuts (my kids don’t like cupcakes), so I’m not much help.
Grace @eatdinner says
I honestly think if it’s homemade it’s OK, but I understand you wanting to stick to your guns. My daughters (oldest in 6th) have been after me to get an “edible arrangement” which is like a flower bouquet with fruit. It’s a franchise, but if you don’t have one near you or it’s too pricey, you might be able to make yourself!
Good luck!
Jenny Staff Johnson says
Oh, no! That is a problem. So glad the first grade teachers at ROE got together and said no food treats on birthdays. What about homemade oatmeal raisin cookies, or some such?
Jamie says
I like the Edible Arrangement idea from Grace. They totally transform boring ole fruit. Plus…anything on a stick is cool.
You best stick to your guns Missy…You and you alone changed MY whole view on Cupcakes At School. If you cave I’m gonna sic my kid on YOU when he realizes he’s not getting CAS on his birthday.
Good luck and Happy Birthday to your daughter!
Milehimama says
What if you made an “edible bouquet” style treat with fruit?
http://www.plan-the-perfect-baby-shower.com/fruit-bouquet.html
Or, you could fill cupcake papers with cut up fruit (strawberries, etc.) and top with real whipped cream “frosting”. The whipped cream could be sweetened with pureed fruit for a no-added sugar (plus coloring). You’d probably have to get the sturdy foil wrappers for that, not paper cupcake wrappers.
You could also make your own fruit strips/fruit rollups, but with a message (maybe your daughter’s name, or “happy birthday” written on it), personalized fruit rollups with all natural fruit like this blogger did:
http://www.fixmeasnack.com/2010/08/homemade-polka-dot-fruit-roll-ups/
What about baking a healthier muffin instead of cupcakes, or even baking them into ice cream cones? There are tons of great, delicious muffin recipes out there (I even have one on my blog! http://www.milehimama.com/2010/09/03/almost-fat-free-pumpkin-muffins/)
NotCinderell says
One wonders if the tradition of bringing cupcakes to school might have been done as a “birthday party” at school with one’s classmates. Rather than having 30 kids over to your house for pin the tail on the donkey, your kid brings cupcakes to school.
Maybe say that she either gets cupcakes at school or a regular cake at her regular party. The prospect of no birthday cake might make her change her mind.
visitor from FAS says
Well, non-food treats which are appropriate probably depend on age and to some extent, what the teacher will support.
For young kids (k~3), stickers, bouncy balls, pencils, and funny erasers are always big hits, though teachers HATE those bouncy balls, for whatever that’s worth. hehehheh…
temporary tattoos?
donate the supplies for a special art or science project? (you could ask the teacher about this one)
donate a GAME to the class to play?
for about the cost of sweet treats, you could donate a hot-air popcorn popper to the classroom– perhaps convince the teacher to celebrate birthdays with a special ‘movie afternoon’ monthly?
A book for the teacher to READ to the class in honor of your dd’s birthday?
A teeshirt-signing with fabric paint pens? That way your daughter has a durable memory and everyone has a great time– without food– but this is probably best for kids over ~8yo because of the mess factor.
corrie says
Look at it as an opportunity to expose the kids to something healthy! I brought organic vegan cookies from Whole Foods to my son’s Christmas party. As I passed them out, I explained what “organic” meant. Before they ate them, one kid said “Hey! This is a party! We’re supposed to have good stuff!” After they ate them, he came up to me and said “Can you write down what kind of cookies those were…I want my mom to get me some.” *yay!*
At the very least, you can show kids that “healthy” things can still taste good…even better than processed crap.
corrie says
Oh! I forgot in the last comment..
If you absolutely do not want to send treats… then you can send gift tress from The Arbor Day Foundation. They come packaged in tubes that can be used as bird feeders after you plant the tree….and only $3 each!
http://www.arborday.org/shopping/gifttrees/step1.cfm
Barbara Mendel says
Someone at Shlenker recently did the edible arrangement and it went over very well. What about frozen yogurt and berries? Is it workable? I did that for Leo’s class last year (preschool) and it was a huge hit for that age and I think it would be for 5th grade, too!
we3beans says
sorry, I don’t really know what 5th graders are into these days.
Non food treats are a challenge and I admire you for sticking to your guns.
Would the kids get the warm and fuzzies from a donation to the school library, children’s musuem, fire dept., food bank etc. made in the class’ name?
Or maybe a craft project? plant something (like homemade chia pets)?
Renee says
How many students are in your daughter’s class?
Aaron’s magic, color-changing, putty is pretty cool, but it might be pricey if it’s a big class.
http://www.puttyworld.com/
Jenn says
I feel you on this one, I caved. My son has allergies to gluten and egg and for just once, wanted to have a treat like everyone else. I was so on the fence but he asks for so little and puts up with so much (like getting a dollar when everyone else got ice cream thanks to his teacher).
I would head over to Party City – they have some great trinkets, coloring books, crayons, crazy pens, etc. Let your daughter be involved in the picking out. Maybe pick a theme and fill the treat bags. My son was totally into this for his birthday because “everyone does food” and I am giving them something they will remember.
I have a Knifty Knitter addiction and his birthday falls in January – everyone is getting a hat with school colors next year – he is very interested in that idea.
Shira says
Fortunately for me, our school district does not allow treats bought in for birthdays (phew!) They also don’t allow bringing in a goody bag full of prizes, etc. in an effort to discourage competition. The only option is to coordinate to do a craft, or read a story to the class. I’m thrilled (and thankful that only one of my children’s birthdays falls during the school year)
Mara says
yikes! I do like the edible fruit arrangement idea and if you brought a little whipped cream along that should make the kids happy. But if you want to stick to your guns some more, you could offer to take a handful of her bffs out right after school that day for real decadence at a place like the chocolate bar or have them over for make your own ice cream sundaes. Another idea could be to bring lunch to the class instead – is pizza any better than cupcakes but kids always love an excuse for a pizza party. hard to think of a non food treat that both 5th grade boys and girls would like. At our school, if you bring a treat it has to be packaged so the kids can bring it home, can’t eat it at school
Michele Hays says
For Valentine’s Day, we made origami flying squirrels (my son’s choice.) They were very well received – if you go to Origamiclub.com there are all kinds of projects with various difficulty ratings.
Dee says
I know you said you do not want to bring food to your daughter’s class, but what about something like this:
http://changeabletable.blogspot.com/2009/07/patriotic-layered-jello-salute-your.html
You could mix jello flavours to make your daughter’s favourite colours, or do a rainbow of flavours. You could use sugar free jello and garnish each cup with some fruit! The only downside to this is that it would take awhile to make since you have to wait for each layer to solidify before adding the next colour.
kathy says
can you make a healthy version of a cupcake? other wise i’d bake pretzels in letter shapes that spell “happy birthday” or in a cupcake shape. good luck!
Tari says
Your daughter’s fellow fifth grader who happens to live in my house 🙂 votes thumbs up on the Edible Arrangement idea, and says that yo yos are a bad idea because so many of the guys in their class already have such expensive ones (it being the biggest “thing” for most of them these days). I think you might be able to get single cone gift certificates at Ben & Jerry’s or Amy’s for a reasonable price; then you wouldn’t be bringing something into school, and each parent would get to choose if/when to use the gift. You might be able to get reduced price gift certificates for a movie matinee – I’ve never tried but I’m sure they have group rates that are lower than regular tickets. This is hard with the class size we have!
Lisa Suriano says
What about doing something like a Whole Wheat Zucchini Bread (email if you want. I have a good recipe for this) or something like Beet-Brownies? (this seems be a pretty cool recipe http://www.plantea.com/chocolatebeetbrownies.htm)
It would be nice to make a point that a treat can be nutritious too.
Niki says
My daughter is a penguin addict, so for her birthday treat next week I’m sending in homemade playdough decorated to look like penguins (white playdough, black foam cutout around the wrap, googly eyes, and a beak); and a cute little cookie cutter with each…. a step up from stickers or pencils, without breaking the bank…. and while edible, really not recommended for eating 🙂
Bettina Elias Siegel says
You are all AMAZING! Thank you to everyone who took time to send in ideas, and please keep ’em coming. I’m going to do a post later this week with everyone’s ideas.
jenna Food w/ Kid Appeal says
what else appeals to your daughter? speaking as a spoonfed mentee, you could use this as an opportunity to talk to her about sharing your family’s values with the class. you know she wants to share a sweet treat with friends, but what else would she like to share? what does she think her friends would like to have from her food or non-food? hobby lobby (craft store) is a great place to find affordable ideas that kids of all ages enjoy.
maybe instead of one trinket for each kid, invest 20-30 bucks in an science-y activity found at a craft store (build your own battery, grow your own strawberries) etc. that the class can do together?? i was just at hobby lobby yesterday and they have some great sets in the $20 range. the teacher might be happy to spend the birthday minutes guiding the students through an activity vs. snack….
another fas visitor says
I just read through your replies here and almost all of them are related to food! Edible arrangements and vegan cookies are still FOOD. If you aren’t sending food, then those replies aren’t really useful.
What do the other kids bring in? What policies are there about birthdays in the district? Do any kids NOT bring in birthday stuff? Most of the kids here (4th grade) don’t bring anything in now. Sometimes they will bring in pencils and funky erasers for the class, twice this year there’s been fruit and oreos, but that’s it for goodies/treats.
There are 27 kids in the class and they’ve celebrated maybe 6 birthdays. The majority of the birthdays pass by with simply their name being announced over the school loudspeaker.
I think that bringing in some sort of over the top bdy thing flaunts money in front of kids who may not afford to do those same things on their birthdays. Since many kids in my town come from migrant families, birthdays are low key out of respect for the working poor.
What sort of education and message do you want your child and her classmates to have with whatever you send in? Figure that out and send in something that relates to that message.
Lauren says
I really like your comment about not flaunting money. I’m glad your school is proactive about respecting these families. I wish more schools would follow that example!
I’m terrible about coming up with nonfood items. Otherwise, fruit would be a great option because most kids DO prefer fruit over veggies. You wouldn’t even need to do the edible arrangement thing (although that would be SWEET…but expensive). I think watching my teacher/a parent cut through a big, red, juicy watermelon would get me much more excited than seeing them cut up a cake. 🙂
I also like the autographing a t-shirt idea.
Would/Does her teacher allow class pets? Maybe her treat to the class could be “donating” a fish/hermit crab/hamster/etc. My favorite grade in elementary school was sixth grade, and that’s because our teacher was the only one in the school that let us keep pets. It really unites a class, I think, and if I were your daughter, I’d feel pretty damn awesome if that pet that everyone was so fond of was MY gift to the class.
Judy says
My fourth grader took a bunch of Kooky’s pens to give out. (They are stubby pens with rubber hair all with different colors and designs, and they can clip onto a backpackor zipper pull.) The kids all loved them, and many still have them on their backpacks months later.
pearlygirl says
it’s probably too late to help you but I understand your dilemma. However it’s about bringing in something special so it does not have to be cake. I do like the tree idea that was mentioned. Very cool idea.
Here is something that I came across and actually did for Thanksgiving dessert for Vegan friends with LOADS of allergies. We had a thai feast (without peanuts) and finished with carved fruit—a tradition in Asia. Their girls 4th and 5th graders thought it was beautiful. These are soooooo much prettier than the edible arrangements that everyone has seen before.
First video has a boring intro but the watermelon carving starts at 1.26 mark. It was easy to copy. At 4.40 mark she carves very simple leaves out of apples and soaks them in lemon water to keep color. The second video is not great quality but shows the most basic of strawberry roses which just look lovely.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebaiDWgu0u4
———————————————
strawberry rose link (please use a SMALLER knife than he does)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5L3ytiYj18&feature=related
Also a totally non food related item are fake mustaches. They are absolute bizarre but trendy. Kids LOVE them and we are going to give them as prizes at the next PTO carnival. I’m hoping that your daughter has a goofy side. My kids stick them on their notebooks and folders as well as wearing them just for fun. My very handsome 8 yr old boy loves pairing a mustache with his cowboy hat and boots (and we live in the north!)
Wendy Campbell says
I’m not sure if this is a ‘too young’ idea for 5th grade, but fun and same idea as fruit bouquet. I made the fish here (scroll down on the site) and substituted cheese for the cantaloupe and it was a huge hit…and EASY!
http://weekofmenus.blogspot.com/2009/05/school-birthday-treats-its-okay-to-rock.html